YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
