Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
