Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
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