I love black thongs
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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