am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
