You did a strip tease for the toilet.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
