there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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