Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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