The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
