And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I wish there were birth control emojis
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
