I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
