Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
it glows. i had to have it.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
