Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
we're blogging at a bar
Moan for me like Helen Keller
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Randomize