just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize
