so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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