I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
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