Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Randomize
