Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Randomize
