went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize