I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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