Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
