Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I just had sex on a roof
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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