I want to have your abortion
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
