He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Randomize