She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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