is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Randomize
