He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Randomize
