If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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