The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
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she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
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i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize