...so i touched it.
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Found the puke drawer
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Randomize
