Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Randomize
