i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
