After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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