i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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