He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
