You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
