do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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