i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize