I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
