I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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