Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize
