There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
They should really pass out barf bags in church
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Randomize
