had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize