I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
