ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
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