Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
