i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize