Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
