I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
