after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize