Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
