Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize