No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
The air was thick with penises
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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